Month: November 2020

8 TIPS TO COMBAT STRESS + ANXIETY

Published on by Crystal Lee4 Comments

I’ve battled with severe bouts of anxiety since I was a child. I won’t get into my life story spiel on that here today, but if you’d like to see a video or potentially even listen to a podcast episode about that, please comment below! I released my first audio download to test the waters on the idea of doing a podcast, so if you’re interested in that medium and want to hear my intimate answer to the frequently asked question “When/Will you ever be coming to YouTube again?”, subscribe to BeautyLeeBar.com for all the updates!!

What I’m sharing here in this post today is a collection of lessons and practices in no particular order that I’ve learned to put into practice over 20 years of battling with this mental health issue. I am 23 years young, just keep that in mind. I promise you that at least one of these 8 tools will help you help yourself and your mental health TODAY! I use all of them regularly, depending on what my mind and body need on any given day.

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Journal – Brain dumping your emotions, thoughts, and circumstances onto a piece of paper gets them out of your racing mind and onto something outside of yourself that you can digest and reflect on. It doesn’t have to make sense, doesn’t have to be intentional, but it has to flow out of you onto that paper. You can make sense of it and set intentions for yourself regarding what to do with it later. The simple act of doing it will usually provide an immediate sense of relief on its own.

Serving Others – Perspective and purpose is everything. Both can be found in serving others. When we’re drowning in our feels and stuck in a shitty season, it can be challenging to see the potential, opportunities, and blessings we have in our grasp. Being of service and helping others provides a great sense of positive purpose that can enlighten and evolve our perspectives and passions. 

Therapy – I struggled with therapy for a long ass time. I’ve talked and walked my way out of therapist’s offices since I was a kid, but boy oh boy, am I a prime candidate!

I didn’t want to feel crazy. I didn’t want to need therapy.

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So I successfully convinced countless therapists I was fiiine after just a couple of sessions. It wasn’t until my emotions got aggressively thrown out of whack when I decided to work in retail that I finally sought and consistently stick to the regular therapy I’ve needed for far too long. It’s something I look forward to every week. It’s like a verbal journaling session with some friendly professional guidance on the digestion and reflection part.

Support – A therapist is an important form of support because they’re completely unbiased to your situation and emotions… and they’re paid to listen. However, the people who love you are important to support tools to get comfortable uncomfortably leaning into when you’re in need. You may feel ashamed or embarrassed about what they’ll think of you or even feel that you don’t want to burden the people you care about with your shit. Those feelings come from a place of care and consideration for those people, which is something that I’d put good money on is reciprocated. They’ll more than likely want to be there for you in your moments of need. I forget to do this one a lot myself, but I’m lucky to have a friend that knows me better than myself some days and pushes me to lean in just when I need to.

Exercise – MOVE. YOUR. BODY. Endorphins are magical things!!! Sweat that anxiety out of your pores one mile or burpee or downward dog at a time. Actively moving your body works wonders for your mind. ALL THE TIME.

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Pray – Whether you’re praying to God or the universe or your loved ones passed or… the black space you see when you close your eyes, whatever works! And it works. Simply voicing your please’s and thank you’s is something we forget to do when we grow up and take the burden of life directly on our backs. Thank you for this and please help me with that. These are super simple sentences that make a big impact in making you feel like you can push gratitude and desires out of your mind and off of your shoulders alone.

Read – Knowledge is power. Educating myself in digestible tidbits daily has done wonders for my confidence and anxiety. Learning is a powerful tool for gaining perspective and inspiring passion and purpose. It’s also just a great temporary distraction from your own whirling thoughts!

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Just Fucking Cry – Self-explanatory. Sometimes, ya just gotta do it and when you give in to that moment, it can feel so good. I’m not a crier… unless I’m watching Forrest Gump, Irreplaceable You, Blue Is The Warmest Color, Freedom Writers, Moonlight, The Pursuit of Happyness, Pearl Harbor, The Boy in the Striped Pajamas, Fruitvale Station and Boys Don’t Cry. I’m a sucker for a heartbreaking/heartwarming story and usually, my tears come from empathy for others, but I don’t cry often for myself. I used to. Then life happens and you get used to sucking it up and moving forward, but sometimes that bottles something up that needs releasing. If that anxiety has you stuck, it’s usually a good time to let the waterworks flow for a hot minute. Indulge in it and let it out.

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These obviously aren’t all of the ways you can relieve anxiety, but they’re mine and now, if any of them resonated with you, they’re yours! They’re simple, you don’t need a prescription for any of ‘em and you can practice them anytime, anywhere. It’s good to have a few of these tools in your back pocket at all times because as I’m sure you already know if you’re reading this, anxiety can be one unpredictable witch!

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7 Oral Sex Positions to Try This Weekend

Published on by Crystal LeeLeave a comment

If there’s one way to celebrate the end of a workweek, the end of 2020 (finally), and the beginning of the holiday season, I’ll say it’s probably an orgasm. But I’m not talking about any orgasm—I’m talking about the incomparable, fireworks-worthy orgasm you receive during oral sex (or the mind-blowing experience of giving it to someone—now that’s magical). 

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Oral sex is a concept most of us have a pretty good handle on. You know, mouths, genitals. It’s not all that complicated. For a long time, I stood by the “You either love it, or you hate it” model. Some people have joyously outrageous orgasms through oral sex, and others aren’t all that into it. And while I think it’s normal and OK to not be into it (or any part of sex, of course), there are a lot of people out there who write off oral sex because they haven’t tried it in a way that makes them feel comfortable, confident, and pleasured. Below, are interesting oral positions to try with your partner if you are new to the oral game. Or if you are an oral-lover, still check out these oral positions, maybe there is one that you and your partner want to try to spice things up a little bit. 

A few things to note:

  • Don’t like oral sex? No problem, try creating a sex bucket list whether you are single or not. 🙂 
  • Your partner doesn’t like oral sex? Here’s how to talk to them.
  • No matter how you have sex, sex is sex—don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. 
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1. Lying on your stomach 

This one lets you touch yourself while your partner uses their mouth on you. Lie on your stomach with your hips slightly arched and your legs spread about just a bit. Your partner is able to go at your from behind, but you’re still comfortably laying down, making this a little different from your typical doggy style.

2. Face-sitting

Both you and your partner can do this one regardless of if they have a penis or vagina. If your partner has a penis, just make sure that they are sitting at an angle so they can enter your mouth without suffocating you, of course. You can face your partner so you have the view of looking at them (and touching them if you’d like), or you can face the opposite way and put the focus all on them pleasuring you.

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3. Standing

This is another easy one to try regardless of your partners’ genitalia. This is a pretty common position if your partner has a penis, but much less so for partners with vaginas. If you have a vagina or your partner does, stand with your legs slightly apart, pushing your pelvis out. It might be easier to lean up against a wall or a table to hold your balance. Another great way to try this one is in the shower!

4. Upside-down Head Over the Bed

I’ve also seen this labeled “giraffe style,” which I absolutely love. Lay on your back with your head over the edge of the bed and tilt back so your upside down. This can be done with a partner who has a vagina or penis, but it’s probably easier with a penis just based on the angle and the penis size. Your partner will enter your mouth from a totally different way than normal, and the view is extra hot. 

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5. Legs around the head

This one is much easier for giving oral sex to a person with a vagina, but it’s not impossible if your partner has a penis. Simply lay back, and after your partner’s head is in your crotch region, you’ll wrap your legs around them. Don’t suffocate them, of course, but loosely wrap your legs around. Your partner can keep touching you or hold onto your legs from the outside.

One variation of this position is often called the “68.” One person lays down on their back while the other lays on their back on top of their partner, wrapping their legs around them with their crotch in their face. You two will be much closer this way, and it’s basically the lazy lovers’ version of 69. 

6. Sitting down

We love a good sitting position here because it’s an easy, applicable way to spin off your usual laying-down positions without having to grab your Kama Sutra book either. You can play this up in tons of ways. Maybe you’re sitting on the kitchen counter, maybe you’re in a desk chair, maybe you’re at the edge of the bed. This is a common position for giving oral sex to people with penises, but it’s a little less common for eating out—which is exactly why you should try it ASAP. 

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7. 69, But Spooning

Aside from the joking territory surrounding 69, you might not realize just how good of an oral sex position it can be. While laying on top of each other is all fun and nice, try spicing it up by doing it from a spooning position laying down on your sides. You both lay on the opposite sides, and go at each other from the side. If you have different genitalia, it might be easier to situate the person with a vagina first as you’ll likely need to prop your leg up a bit or get closer to your partner, whereas it’s a little easier if they have a vagina. You’ll be super close, and going at each other from this different angle might even help you find some new spots each of you likes. Orgasms for all!

Anxious? Try This Doctor-Approved Breathing Trick

Published on by Crystal LeeLeave a comment

Anxiety has a very unwelcome way of popping up when you least expect it.

When you’re anxious or stressed, you don’t usually pay attention to your breathing. You either overdo it, taking short breaths or don’t do it at all. It’s quite possible to suddenly realize you’ve been holding your breath and clenching your jaw for ages if you’re stressed out.

Just thinking about your breath and paying attention to it can have a calming effect though. It’s not something we do very often but breathing properly is so important. And using a focused breathing technique can be even more helpful when you’re anxious or stressed. 

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It’s a technique that has been used in yoga for thousands of years and yes, it focuses on breathing through the nose. Hillary Clinton gave it a shout out in her autobiography, What Happened in 2017. It was one of the things she said she used to recover from losing the American election to Donald Trump in 2016.

And, hey, if it’s good enough for Hillary…

It’s a very simple trick to master and you can use it anywhere – once you get the hang of it.

HOW TO PRACTICE ALTERNATE NOSTRIL BREATHING:

Step One:

Sit in a comfortable position if you can. On the floor on in a chair with your back straight and feet planted on the ground.

Step Two:

Using your right thumb, gently close your right nostril and inhale slowly through your left nostril.

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Step Three:

Gently close your left nostril by pressing on it with your ring (third) finger. As you do so, open your right nostril and slowly exhale out of it.

Step Four:

Still in this position, inhale through your right nostril, then close it, before opening your left nostril and slowly exhaling thought it. Then inhaling once again.

And that’s basically it! You can repeat the moves five to ten times and the technique will get smoother after a few goes.

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Taking deep slow breaths in this way could help you find your way out of feeling anxious or stressed. Fans of alternate nostril breathing also reckon it helps with focus, lowers the heart rate and makes you more alert too. 

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Sheet Mask Not Delivering Glow-Enhancing Results? This Could Be Why

Published on by Crystal Lee2 Comments

Turns out there’s actually a fine art to applying a sheet mask that, until now, nobody was aware of. 

It’s a little known fact that face masks can solve any of life’s problems. Bad day at work? Face mask. Overplucked your eyebrows? Face mask. Rent is due next week and you have less than five euro in your bank account? Face mask.  Accidentally swiped left to a super hot guy with a dog on Tinder? Face mask.

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While it may not exactly ~solve~ those problems, a face mask will, however, distract you long enough that you won’t become a nervous wreck and that’s pretty much the same thing. But face masks can be time-consuming, especially if you go the DIY route. So that’s why when sheet masks first came on the scene, our lazy but enjoys-being-pampered selves were thrilled. 

TRENDING TODAY: 5 “MEH” BEAUTY PRODUCTS YOU REALLY DON’T NEED IN YOUR ROUTINE

Simply take out of the packet, pop on your face, leave for 15 minutes and boom, glowing skin. Easy right? Well, actually no – it’s not that simple. Turns out there’s actually a fine art to applying a sheet mask that until now, nobody was aware of. 

It may be that you forgot to set a timer, you applied too much product, or you simply picked up the wrong formula. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there. Thankfully, this is a judgement-free zone and we’ve got you covered. Keep scrolling for common mistakes and a few tips on applying (and removing) a sheet mask correctly.

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NOT USING THE RIGHT KIND OF MASK FOR YOUR SKIN

So okay, maybe this seems like an obvious one but we bet at some stage in your sheet mask life, you’ve bought one just because it’s metallic gold…and not because it’s actually good for your skin. Hey, no judgement, we’ve done it too, but as fun as it is to have a metallic gold face for 15 minutes, you really should start paying attention to what skin type those face masks are designed for and buying the ones that best suit you and your skin.

USING TOO MUCH PRODUCT 

From foundation to ketchup, we’ve got a heavy hand when it comes to liquids and it’s no different when we use an ‘apply it yourself’ face mask. Look, there are days where our skin feels extra crap so we tend to whack on a thicker layer than usual to give our skin that bit more TLC but the truth is:  it’s actually doing more damage.

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TREATING FACE MASKS AS A TREAT

If we have a special event coming up, we often get a bit too excited because it gives us an excuse to pamper ourselves. But guess what? You don’t need an excuse to treat yourself.  You should be incorporating a face mask into your weekly skincare routine. If you’re unsure of how frequently you should be using a face mask, check the back of the packaging because no two face masks are the same. Some will suggest once a week only where others will recommend 3-4 times a week. 

NOT PREPPING YOUR SKIN BEFOREHAND

So picture this: you’re having a no make-up day and it hits about 8 pm and you’re feeling very proud of yourself for giving your face a chance to breathe so you think about treating it that bit more by doing a face mask, so you just lash it on without washing your face first. Sound familiar? Us too. Just because you haven’t applied makeup to remove doesn’t mean you can skip a cleanse. You should be applying your face mask to clean, dry skin so not giving your face a wash beforehand just means you’re layering a face mask on top of dirt and bacteria it’s picked up during the day… #gross.

THINKING A FACE MASK IS THE FINAL STEP

Hate to break this one to you but a face mask doesn’t solve all of life’s problems. After masking, you aren’t finished. You need to carry on with your regular skincare regime, applying toner, serum and most importantly a moisturizer is key to locking in all those face mask benefits.

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USING A SHEET MASK STRAIGHT OUT OF THE PACKET

https://www.instagram.com/p/B5Ntof8AOsu/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Okay, so maybe you’re thinking we’re the silly ones for not already knowing this but you should be cutting your face mask to make it fit your face. We mean once you think about it, it makes a lot of sense. You cut your false eyelashes to fit your eyes, so you should be cutting your sheet mask to fit your face instead of almost suffocating because it’s too big.

USING A DIRTY BRUSH

https://www.instagram.com/p/CHvUi7TpWZc/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Now judge us all you want, but sometimes we just can’t find the energy to wash our brushes but applying a face mask with an unwashed brush is utterly pointless. Not only are you contaminating your tub of face mask by dipping a dirty brush into the pot, but you’re also then smearing all that bacteria around your face which is doing more harm than good. 

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LEAVING A FACE MASK ON TOO LONG

It happens: the packet says to leave on for 15 minutes so you take to Instagram to fill the time but you get carried away creeping on your crush account and suddenly, an hour has gone by. Leaving a face mask on longer than it should be is actually super harmful to your skin because the benefits only apply while the mask is still wet. Once the mask dries out, it begins to draw moisture and vitamins away from your face as opposed to nourishing the skin like intended.

YES, THERE IS A RIGHT SIDE

Again, so maybe we really just didn’t have a clue about sheet masks to begin with but we’re feeling confident that you too have at one stage or another worn a sheet mask the wrong way round. It’s time to set the record straight reveal that the side facing the paper is the side you should be applying to our skin. Groundbreaking, we know. 

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