Everybody tells a story. By merely paying attention to body language, you can get your first clue as to if your potential match may go the distance. The way you move, react, and interact can send a signal about the way you are feeling at any given moment. But what about the way someone reacts to you? Is it possible to tell what someone is thinking about you simply by the way they move their body?

In the world of first dates and new relationships, the body language from either party can express more than the actual words themselves. As humans, we like to touch the things we like. We like to be physically close to people we like. Touch and sweet gestures can signal the beginning stages of a possible long-term connection with your date.

The most obvious form of body language that indicates your date is interested in you is touch. Touch is a great sign of interest. Placing a hand on the small of your back as you enter a restaurant speaks volumes. Reaching across the table and touching your hand for a quick second shows interest. Gestures and facial expressions can also add to the element of attraction. Direct eye contact during your date is also a good sign of someone liking you.

As a general rule, we like to be physically close to someone we feel a connection with. Being physically close to someone is a human craving, but the human connection needs to come first. One good way to tell if your date is feeling connected to you is to pay attention to the amount of physical space between you. We’ve all had those awkward encounters where your date maintains a 3-foot distance from you at all times. Or worse yet, your date walks 10 feet in front of you and leaves you in the dust. In these instances, it’s generally safe to say there is not a great connection between you.

To ensure your body language is received favorably, it’s important to be available. This means keep your hands on the table so they can be touched. Uncross your arms as you walk so your date can take your hand. Walk-in a relaxed and carefree posture and expect nothing. That way, if there is a reach for your hand, it’s comfortable and not forced. In other words, make yourself touchable (but not too touchable!).

Call me a hopeless romantic, or simply old-fashioned, but I think traditional roles should still be considered when making the first move on a date. When making the first move to hold hands or walk arm-in-arm, if you want to scrap tradition and go for it, you need to be equally ready to accept rejection if your date is not feeling the vibe.

To let your date know you are interested, a smile works wonders and also helps to ease the first date jitters. Eye contact goes a long way to promote interest, especially when done with a slight touch on the arm or hand across the table. Sitting across from your date rather than side by side at the table gives a better view of your body language. Oh, and leaning in to talk signals, “I like you.”


Tense, ridged, and upright body language signals stress and straight-up anxiety, something no one wants to deal with, especially on a first date. The more calm the body language, the calmer and more productive the date will be. Here’s to a successful first date.

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Michelle Afont is a relationship expert, divorce lawyer, and author of The Dang Factor. She has witnessed firsthand the reasons for the demise of over 50% of the marriages throughout the United States. Her vast experience in the world of breakups, heartbreak, makeups, and re-launching love is the reason she changes the way women love. Michelle has conducted extensive research on the intricacies of love, commitment, faithfulness, and what makes a relationship work. Follow her on InstagramFacebook, and Twitter for more relationship advice.

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